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36

Its very longing is the source of your search,

its longing is the tension that you are today

and its longing will be the freedom

that you will be tomorrow.

The essence is there and

the existence will follow if you so wish.

Please follow its call to the conclusion.

Go on doing meditation.

Do not seek results,

they will come by themselves when the time is ripe.

And the time is ripe

but you still are not.

Let meditation ripen you.

314. Love.

Life is non-fragmentary,

but mind makes it appear fragmentary;

and this fragmentation creates all the problems.

Beware of fragments

and always look beyond them

and below them

and through them –

then you will be able to see the ocean

in spite of all the waves.

The waves are in the ocean

but the waves are not the ocean.

The ocean can be without the waves

but the waves cannot be without the ocean.

315. Love.

Mind means duality

and meditation, oneness.

In Zen they call it – The One Sword.

Kusunoki Masashige came to a Zen monastery

when he was about to meet the oncoming army

of Ashikaga Takanji, and asked the master:

When a man is at the parting of the ways

between life and death, how should he behave?

The master answered: Cut off your dualism

and let the one sword stand serenely by itself

against the sky!

316. Love.

The real thing is

not to fight with your thoughts or desires or instincts

because that is negative

and the negative cannot help.

The real thing is

to grow in awareness, in meditation,

because then one wins without any fight whatsoever.

And to win through conflict is not a real victory

because that which has been suppressed

will have to be suppressed again and again.

Through conflict there is no end to conflict

and through fight only more fight is born.

But there is a victory

without any conflict, fight or suppression.

That victory comes through positive growth in awareness.

Do not fight with yourself

but grow in awareness and understanding and silence,

and all that is negative and diseased

will have withered away by itself.

Suzuki tells a story:

Chi Hsing Tzu was raising a fighting cock for his lord.

Ten days passed and the lord asked:

Is he ready? Chi answered:

No sir, he is not ready.

He is still vain and flushed with rage.

Another ten days passed and the prince asked

about the cock.

Chi said: Not yet, sir.

He is on the alert whenever he sees the shadow

of another cock

or hears its crowing.

Still another ten days passed

and when the inquiry came from the prince, Chi replied:

Not quite yet, sir.

His sense of fighting is still smoldering within him

ready to be awakened.

When another ten days elapsed

Chi replied in response to the inquiry:

He is almost ready.

Even when he hears another crowing he shows

no excitement.

He has now become positive.

He has grown in subtle inner awareness.

Now he resembles one made of wood,

he is so quiet and silent.

His qualities are integrated.

No cock is his match

and to win he will not have to fight

because other cocks will run away from him immediately.

They cannot face him now.

And really it proved so.

He won fights without fighting at all.

And I say that you can do likewise with yourself:

learn the secret from Chi Hsing Tzu’s cock!

317. Love.

Everything has happened as it should happen.

And l was surprised not because you ran away from here

but because I never thought you could be

so predictable!

It is not from here that you have escaped,

it is only a vain effort to escape from yourself

which is impossible.

How can one escape from oneself?

But in meditation a moment comes,

necessarily comes, when the mind tries the impossible –

for the mind this is the last defensive act.

Meditation is ultimately suicidal to the mind.

And of course the mind must be given a chance –

and you have given it!

Meditation is encountering yourself

directly and in your total nakedness.

This creates fear and the futile effort to escape.

The effort is futile because

whatsoever is known once is known forever

and you cannot be the old ignorant person again.

There is no way to go back

and there is no bridge.

This escape will make you more mature too

and you will come back strengthened

through it and because of it.

Now relax there under the sky and beside the sea

and I will be there.

Whenever you are relaxed you will feel my presence.

And when you feel like coming, come back –

and soon you will feel this.

I will be waiting here for you as ever.

Come and continue the arduous journey

towards your self.

318. Love.

I know that the apprenticeship

is very hard but worth it.

So keep on. It is arduous,

but one has to pay for everything,

and in no other way can you get to the great treasure.

You have longed for it for lives and lives

and now when the time is ripe

and the key is being given to you

do not lose courage.

Access to the treasure is difficult

because it is hidden

in our own unconscious layers of the mind.

It will be easy if you approach that threshold

when the diurnal tide is favorable,

that is when you are passing from sleep to waking

or from waking to sleep.

So evening and morning

are probably the best times for meditation.

You might have noticed that when the mind

is recovering from sleep it takes at least fifteen minutes

to close one aperture and fully open the other.

That is why dreams

cannot last longer than that

in your memory after waking.

When the mind is approaching sleep

it again passes the same threshold.

Be aware of this threshold

because it is very significant

for those who are in search of the inner treasure.

This threshold is the gate to the unknown.

This threshold,

this gap between waking and sleep,

must be used for meditation.

Be aware of the gap,

be a witness of the interval,

and you will be transformed.

319. Love.

I know what is happening to you –

nothingness is descending, emptiness is increasing.

Welcome it, and rejoice in its coming.

Dance in ecstasy because

there is no other way to welcome it.

And the more you dance, the more you will die.

And when you are completely dead you will be reborn.

And the moment is near, very near – just by the corner.

You have passed through the entrance-explosion and now

be ready for the ultimate.

Look at yourself once more

as the river looks at itself before falling into the ocean,

because after falling into the ocean

there will be no one to look, and no one to be looked at!

320. Love.

What is meditation?

Hsu Yun says: Meditation lies in laying down.

But laying down what?

Laying down yourself – because nothing less will do.

Have you ever been at the bedside of a dead man?

If you try to scold him he will not be excited,

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